life and death. (long post)

so i found out on wed, that my best friend cassandra's dad was in a car accident and broke his back in 3 places. i wanted to be there for her and her family since they are like my second family (they have welcomed me and accepted me into their BIG family). so the accident happend on tuesday and her brother was driving her dad home from his doc appointment, along with the new baby in the back seat. his dad asked him a question and her turned to respond and was not paying attention to the road when his dad tensed up and told him to look, and as he looked he hit a light pole. her brother and baby were perfectly fine, however her dad broke his back. so i found out on facebook from another friend and i called cass immediately, she asked me to pick up my nieces and bring them to the hospital, so i did. when i got there i found out what had happend and what condition her dad was in. on wed the doctors had placed a breathing tube along with many medications.

her dad (john) was in so much pain they had him on the drug michael jackson died from because they wanted him to rest and not move and when he was awake he moved to much so basiclly he was in a coma. thursday he got a little better, but was still in the same condition. all the family started to show up thursday. friday john was still in the same condition however toward the end of the night he started to wake up and respond to our voices.
saturday he was doing great, he was able to squeeze our hands and respond to what we were saying, even the doctors said he was doing great and they were going to prepare to send him home. then we checked in with her mom sunday morning and her dad had a fever, and an infection in his lungs, so we got the girls and drove the hospital. when we got there her mom did not tell us he had gone into cardiac arrest.

10 min after being there the doctors came out and told cassandra, her mom, her aunt, her cousin and my self that there is nothing else they can do for him and we needed to decide whether to continue cpr or to let him go, and her mom decided to let him go because he was in so much pain and he didn't want to live like that. so the entire family came to the hospital and said goodbye. i was taking care of my nieces because we had not told them yet and the youngest has such a close bond with john we didn't know how to tell her. how do u tell a 6 and 4 year old grandpa isn't coming home this time. i felt they knew because when we told jade (the 4 yr old) she had to save her first tooth to fall out till he got home she said he wasn't coming home. so after we told them they had lots of questions and it was me trying to answer them. how do u say grandpa is in heaven but his body is still here, since they didn't understand. kalayah didn't cry till i told her it was okay to be sad and okay to cry. i told her that bc i could see she wanted to cry but didn't know if it was ok and as soon as i said it was ok she balled.

it hurt even more to see them go through something they didnt understand and not have all the answers or a way to comfort them. the only thing that seemed to help was going to see the new babies in the maturnity ward. i had taken jade on saturday to see the babies through the window and she was happy, so through all this i took both girls and there was this beautiful new baby girl and when i asked the proud daddy when she was born he said 1:30 which was the time john was pronounced dead. in a matter of a week i watched a man go from bad to good to worse and a new baby be born. i found a quote i love "god grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change, courage to change the things i can; and wisdom to know the difference." from this point on all i can do is be there for my best friend and her family and try to get through this week.